Lately, I have been struggling with this question. If I’m truly happy, can I still continue writing and find enough emotion behind my stories? I could coldly divide us writers into two groups: those whose texts are pure emotion and those whose texts tell more structured well-thought stories. I know, I know, this is a total generalization but let’s all believe it for a moment for the sake of my point in this post.
I’m one of the emotional writers. When I pick up my pen and start writing, only feelings came out to the paper. That’s why I – like most emotion writers – can’t grasp the skill of novel-making. My texts are short descriptions of the world like I see it, poems. I hate poetry but it’s the only thing I can write. I know because people keep telling me that after reading the mess I call poetry. My feelings awake feelings in others.
So, what happens after my feelings are gone? What if I only have happiness, positive energy and will to keep living my current life? Until now for years my writings have been full of depression, sadness and dying a little bit every day because my life will never be as I have dreamed of. It has never necessarily been me feeling that bad inside but rather just a small unpleasant feeling of being utterly lost giving strength to those negative thoughts while writing. Now I’m finding myself.
Not everyone who writes can understand this. I would hope that no one else except me can understand but unfortunately, that’s not true. You don’t necessarily have to be in the same situation as me: finding yourself after being lost for years. This feeling I’m currently stuck with comes from writer’s life changing so tragically that they will get scared of this sudden change affecting their writing. The nightmare of any writer is losing their own voice or skill to put words on the paper.
Now we know what I’m scared of – my life changing and me losing all the emotions shining through my writing. I’m scared of losing my own style and skills to write. It’s not just my problem. For romance writers, this might be from losing their trust to love or getting divorced. For horror writers, not being scared of anything anymore. And for poets, losing their sight of this world. For a moment all of us will feel like everything is falling down. What will we be without our skills to write?
I started this article by talking about two types of writers, storytellers and feeling sharers, so you are probably already wondering where was I going with that. My writing style is purely emotional. It has always been but it may not continue like that forever. Last months I have been scared but that also means realizing new truths of my own life. I can write. Listen to me if you are a writer in the same situation as me: YOU CAN WRITE. That’s it, so simple.
Losing my emotions or my writing style changing doesn’t mean
that I will lose my skills to write.
Right now I’m an emotional writer who has always dreamed of writing her own novel or longer stories with real plot and fantasy. For some reason, all I can come up are the short poems. Where will it take me when I lose my style to write through emotions? Towards the storyteller end of this writer spectrum.
I still have all the writing skills and beautiful words inside me. I know what works and what not while writing. All I need to write is inside me ready to come out of my pen. The only things missing are the endless emotions that made my texts so short and hard to read. After I learn how to structure a plot, I’m left with all the skills and willpower to write longer books full of stories.
Maybe change isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it may take us towards something even better or at least newer routes to conquer. As writers, no one can take away our skills to show emotions and tell stories. Whatever happens, my mind will always grave for writing and I won’t allow myself to be scared anymore.
What would it matter if my writing style changed?
I will just change along and create something new and even better.
Does this make any sense for you? Or have you ever been scared of losing your own voice? Like always all comments are more than welcome!
Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure.
Continue to reach out.
– Benjamin Franklin