Don’t fall in love with a writer

Writers aren’t made for love. Real love, relationships, and giving our full attention to someone won’t be possible. Every soft touch, smile, kiss, hug, date, beautiful person is possible story idea. Every moment with someone we have fallen in love could become part of a story.

Don’t fall in love with a writer if you don’t want to be immortal through their books. Writers change their feelings and life experiences to written words, sentences and paragraphs. Nothing will be secret. Not really. You can ask them to keep secrets or maybe they will want to do that themselves ― even writers want to keep something only for themselves. But trying isn’t good enough. The words will come out. Their pens can’t stop and before you even realize the love between you two is accessible to everyone in the pages of books.

It won’t say your name or their name. There will be a lot of bullshit before, between and after. However, it’s about the small things. You will regocnize words you have said or your lover has said for you. The feelings of your kisses, the characters go for dates that remind the ones you have been on. It’s all about the small things. Writer won’t tell the story of you two but if they truly love you it shines through the text. For them the feeling of love means you.

This doesn’t mean they always write about you.

It’s not better. Believe me.

Those who write tend to fall for everyone. A random person sitting next to them on a train, that gorgeous singer, your best friend, themselves, a neighbor who has dedicated his life to make your life a hell, the spouse of your sister, the librarian, another librarian, every clerk in your local store, everyone. 

We could have a never-ending fight of “Is it love, if you want to write about someone? If you can’t stop thinking about them because the stories just linger around your mind?” and the answer will depend on the person. But one thing is clear. You will never be the only person in writer’s mind. You have to share the space with characters from villains to heroes and from love-interests to almost perfect heroines.

It’s possible to plead your writer to stop just for one date night. However, I doubt it would work out like you want. It’s in our nature to write, to find new ideas and to always see everything from the mindset of a storyteller. You have fallen for a dreamer who will never grow up. It may sound a cliche but it’s the truth.

Despite all the bad points falling head over heels with a writer may be the best experience of your life. Why? That I will share with you next Friday…

“If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die.”
―Mik Everett


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